31 flavors of juicy cock…yum, yum, give me some!

i’ve sucked on a good number of cocks in my short dating span of 6 years, and have come up with several findings on this very fascinating subject…

1. penises come in all shapes, sizes, hairiness, hooded and non-hooded, textures, smells, and tastes….i could go on, but you get the picture, variety is the spice of life and guys cum in more than 31 flavors…

2. what’s in a name?…some guys like to name their cocks and refer to them in the third-person, “he’s my best friend, always there when you need him, sticks by your side” kind of a way…it’s actually really sweet! i usually ask, if little “insert name,” can cum out to play!

3. guys either are growers (their flaccid dicks grow into visibly larger erections…down little doggie!) or show-ers (not much size difference between the flaccid and erect states)…my personal preference is for growers cuz i’m totally into gadgets and gizmos and a cracker jack surprise, but hey, no worries, you show-ers, by the time i get to a guy’s dick in hand, the surprise is usually already revealed before i even begin my magic trick. and let’s face it, a nice dick is a yummy treat however way you get to it!

4. not all erections are created equal…some curve to the right while others curve to the left, some stand straight up, while others poke out like a tree branch ready for a bird to sit on and tweet her beautiful song…

5. hard dicks are amazingly strong…one guy i was with, even held up a towel with his…talk about cock push-ups, yum!

6. cocks are very durable and can withstand a lot of pressure…one guy had me squeeze his penis as hard as i could like a stressball to get over my fear that i’d somehow break a penis if i sucked on it too hard or squeezed it too tightly…

7. most guys really like to have their cocks sucked on (period, end of sentence), but fast and hard is the usual pace they likey that you sucky on their woody (my approach has always been soft and supple kisses and licks, gradually growing into a faster, rhythmic full throttle suckfest only at the very end)…

8. most guys are more than happy to show you how to jack them off, how much pressure to put on them, speed, techniques…practice makes perfect!

9. most guys like it when i deepthroat their dicks, but boys and girls, if you feel like gagging, don’t do it…the real secret to giving a great blowjob is to wrap your lips firmly around the head of the cock and massaging the shaft with a tight fist, making sure to lubricate it well with your saliva…

10. some guys like their balls sucked on, rolled around gently in my mouth like a jawbreaker, and licked flirtatiously, while others have very sensitive balls and prefer not to be touched at all (i always politely ask if they enjoy having their balls being played with)…

11. most dicks don’t like to be bit, so be sure to wrap your lips over your teeth when giving a blowjob, but some dicks do like gentle nibbles from time to time…please ask the dick your sucking on first!

12. most guys are pleasantly surprised or even apologetic about cumming in my mouth (they are very polite to let me know when they are about to ejaculate, perhaps expecting me to pull my mouth away in disgust, and really excited when i don’t pull away and instead, swallow up their juicy goodness)…they tell me that the girls they dated before usually spit it out…am i just in the minority? i like the taste of cum and the way it slides down my throat.

***blowjob advice #169: when giving a blowjob, please always use a condom until you know for certain that the dick is std-free and exclusively dating you.

13. most guys’ cocks are extra sensitive right after ejaculating, they usually like for me to step away from their cocks and let them just lie in sheer exhaustion and ecstasy…

14. when guys are having their orgasms, there is a wide range of reactions and sensations:
a) makes the most excruciating sounds as if he is being tortured with needles being jabbed underneath his fingernails,
b) clenches his legs in a wwf wrestler’s killer thigh crunch and you better move out of the way or you just might get snapped into two,
c) cusses up a storm like nobody’s business,
d) doesn’t even make a peep, but thanks you generously and vocally afterwards, and/or
e) starts convulsing, screaming, moaning, and his head starts spinning around like the exorcist…kind of scary, but also really fun, especially if you leave him completely breathless and gasping for dear life…

15. some guys are totally grossed out about kissing right after i’ve swallowed their cum, while others are more than eager to play tongue hockey with me and ready for another round…some really enjoy tasting their cum in my mouth…hot!

#1 exclusive bonus fact: most guys are sensitive about their dicks, whether they measure up to others or look sexy enough to their lovers, and i’m here to tell you guys, we wouldn’t be sucking on them if you had an unappealing dick…really, we like you and your cock just the way you both are.

ahhh, but i know that there’s always something new to learn…call it penis-envy or rather penis-curious, this scientist shall continue on her pursuit of cock enlightenment! yum, yum, give me some!!!